Desperate Times

Call for extra-cheering up measures. This is only because I couldn't find the footage of the baby bear falling asleep.



Baby corgle!

UPDATE: This is what I meant to post.

Breakfast for Dinner Pt. 3

There are so many vegetables that you can put eggs on! For instance, maybe a springtime artichoke? First, prepare the artichoke as you normally would (Cut off the bottom stem, cut off the top inch, cut off all the prickly points, pull off the bottom few layers of leaves.) Then boil them in salt water for 30 minutes. Take them out and drain them upside down. Pull them open and pull out the middle purple leaves, and use a melon baller to remove the choke. Now you can put whatever you want in them, and then bake them in the oven till they are tender. Above is a fried egg in the middle, but if it were me, I'd just crack an egg in the middle and then bake it.

5 for $5 Brooklyn Decker Deal

Today someone asked me if I thought Mandy Moore would be upset that Zach Braff is engaged to Brooklyn Decker. I said, "Is that a new kind of pizza from Domino's? Why would she be jealous of a pizza?"

But apparently, she is a supermodel, not a pizza, FYI.

Polygamist Fashion

This article is pretty interesting, about the possible effects on fashion of polygamist dress with all the scandal and news coverage going on. At the end of the article it states, "'Unexpected perversion? Right-wing fads? Sounds like a good Halloween costume ... or Marc Jacobs Spring '09.'"

Um, Spring '09? have you seen Spring '07 and '08? Try space polygamist from the future.

(Marc Jacobs Spring '07 Space Polygamist)

Done and done.

Breakfast for Dinner Pt. 2

Spring means putting poached eggs on your food, and not just your salad! Here's a good recipe for Roasted Asparagus with Poached Eggs:

• 1 medium thick asparagus bunch, tough ends removed


• 2 tablespoons olive oil


• Coarse salt


• 1/2 cup balsamic vinegar


• 1 teaspoon light-brown sugar


• 1 tablespoon cider vinegar


• 4 large eggs


• 2 ounces shaved parmesan

Steam asparagus. Toss with olive oil. Mix sugar and balsamic vinegar, bring to a boil and reduce. Poach eggs, putting vinegar in poaching water. Place eggs over asparagus, sprinkle with coarse salt and shaved parmesan.

Come over to my house, I will cook this for you.

Love 2 the 9's

The title of this article was very confusing, "Prince drops copter in galpal's yard" when I first read it. First thoughts: What is Prince (The Artist) doing flying a helicopter? Second thoughts: Where is galpal? Is that a country?

(Prince William and Kate Middleton)

Turns out, it meant that Prince William landed his helicopter in Kate Middleton's yard! Apparently people are pissed about this, since you shouldn't be flying military helicopters to visit your girlfriend. Personally, I think that Kate Middleton is pretty much perfect (she's cute, and british, and dresses all fashionable-equestriany, and is dating a prince) and if I were her, I'd expect helicopter visits.

FOAAAM!

Sony made a camera commercial in Miami, and they flooded the streets with thousands of gallons of foam.



Yay foam!

You Should Get Some Sandals

It is starting to warm up, and that means comfy sandals! Yesterday I got these shoes by Jeffrey Campbell in tan.
They are like wearing leather foot pillows, and they still have heels!

Celebrities!

Doesn't Ed Helms(<----) look kinda like Jason Sudeikis(---->)?
Don't you think they could be brothers? I know I got them confused.

Cimmmmammmmooommoonnnnn!

I don't know if you guys have heard of this Cinnamon Toast Crunch (CTC) yet, but it is the shit. It is crunchy, and sweet and cinnamony, and you can eat it by itself or with milk.

It is not toast, and doesn't have anything to do with toast, if you were thinking that. But it is okay, it is still pretty good. You could also have it with ice cream. Or make it into cereal bars.

Cup-a-cake

My desk calendar (500 Cupcake Recipes) is getting increasingly disturbing with it's recipe variations. The other day, "Rum Raisin Cupcakes" was modified later into the week into "Vodka and Chilli Cupcakes," which is upsetting and not OK.

Today it suggested adding zucchini to the low-fat chocolate muffin recipe. Sounds okay, right? Not after you read the ingredient change. Add 1/2 cup of shredded zucchini, and a teaspoon of fresh ground black pepper.

(Mmmm.... green Totoro cakes!)

I am anti-spicy cupcakes. Unless it is cinnamon. I bet you a million dollars the guy who wrote these recipes is British.

Bacon Gimlets, Anyone?

So, lately there's been a lot of talk about bacon vodka. Which sounds like a bad idea, combining two dangerous things into one super-dangerous thing. Also, do you really want to be making alcohol that needs the fat strained out of it?
But then on the other hand, it is bacon flavored vodka. Bacon vodka martini and bacon? Bacon vodka cream sauce and orecchiette with spring peas and prosciutto? Mmmm nom nom nom.

Spring Showers

It has been raining a lot lately, since it is spring. And someone developed the easiest way for you to make your dog terrified of an umbrella- The Pet Umbrella!

I actually am recommending that all pet owners get one of these, mainly because I want to see someone try to hold an umbrella over themselves, hold one over their dog, and pick up after their dog all during a blustery storm. Bonus amusement points for trying to get coffee, mail, or opening doors. Extra bonus points when I see your dog get all snorfy in a muddy puddle, since it is a dog and there is a 110% chance of puddle snorfing.

Breakfast Salad

Last night I had breakfast salad. Apparently, it is traditionally called "Salad Lyonnaise" (Lyonnaise is French for "Breakfast"). I am now devoting my life to perfecting this salad. Things you need to make it: poached egg, bacon, frisse, cold potatoes, dijon vinaigrette.

PS- I lied. Lyonnaise is French for "place in France that likes breakfast."

The possibilities!!!

You can wear this Roberto Cavalli Velour Coat with Fox Fur Trim so many ways, it is totally worth the $3,000.00 investment! You can wear it to the next Harry Potter film release, or to a Lion, Witch and the Wardrobe costume party, or anywhere at all if you are a wizard.
Limited Inventory! Sell out Risk: VERY HIGH, Be the first to write a review!

Vesper!

You can't argue with a drink made up by James Bond: "I never have more than one drink before dinner. But I do like that one to be large and very strong and very cold and very well-made. I hate small portions of anything, particularly when they taste bad."


The Vesper:
Three measures of Gordon's, one of vodka (100 proof), half a measure of Lillet Blanc. Shake it very well until it's ice-cold, then add a large thin slice of lemon peel.

Siiiiiiiisssssters

Dear Sister,

I am sorry that we drank too much last night and got in a drunken fight and I put a hole in your face. I promise that one day you will laugh about this. I love you.

Strumpy Little Harlot

When you start watching the video on this site it doesn't seem like anything special. Just bears and trees until HOLY SHIT DID THAT BEAR JUST POP AND LOCK?

(This bear is a total slut.)

Cooorgles.

I've been thinking a lot about corgis lately. It is hard to not like corgis. They are British, they are fat in the middle, and one kind is even called "Cardigan" (though I do not think this is because they used to be made into sweaters.) The Queen really likes them too, and has a bunch. Sometimes they breed with her dachshunds. When asked how the small dogs were able to mate with the big dogs, the Queen said, "Oh, it's quite simple. We have a little brick," which is gross.

(Helen Mirren as Queen Elizabeth II, Corgis as Queen Elizabeth II's corgis.)

Cheering Up Things

Finally, this handbag is back in stock at www.shopbop.com. It is a good thing to cheer you up if you buy it and then carry it around. Or maybe just look at it and think of carrying it around. It has two straps in case you fill it with too many cheering up things and then it is heavy and you need to put it over your shoulder.


Other things that cheer you up (some of these you can put in the bag): giant sharpie markers, puppy dogs smiling, whiskey.

UPDATE: Did you know there is a city called Surprise, Arizona? I think they should call it "SURPRISE!, AZ"